


aftermath

by intergalacticships (thelesterhowells)



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Malex, alex talks about his nightmares, nothing to major though, references to his deployments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2020-01-01 01:51:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18326267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelesterhowells/pseuds/intergalacticships
Summary: "He wasn’t used to dreams about losing Michael, he didn’t know how to handle something that felt so close to home. All he could seem to decide on was to just stay in bed and snuggle up to Michael’s back. He pressed his face into those beautiful brown curls, inhaling the scent of Michael’s shampoo and holding him while he tried to regain his breath."





	aftermath

**Author's Note:**

> big thank you to [@sammc42](http://sammc42.tumblr.com/) for beta reading this! :) 
> 
> hope you enjoy!

Alex lay in bed, it had been at least a half hour and he was still wide awake. He jerked into consciousness after a bad dream, not anything new for him, but tonight was different. Tonight his dream wasn’t about bombs or guns, war zones or injured innocent people. Having nightmares about his deployments was something he had been dealing with for years. It didn’t make it any easier, but he learned methods to calm himself down and eventually could fall asleep again. Tonight his dream was about losing Michael, a feeling he already knew all too well. He had faced this exact fear in real life only a few months ago bringing it far to close to home for comfort. He wasn’t used to dreams about losing Michael, he didn’t know how to handle something that felt so close to home. All he could seem to decide on was to just stay in bed and snuggle up to Michael’s back. He pressed his face into those beautiful brown curls, inhaling the scent of Michael’s shampoo and holding him while he tried to regain his breath.

Michael stirred, turning around to face Alex, still sound asleep. It had been four months since Michael first stayed the night at his place as his not-anymore-on-and-off-ex-something and it was still so overwhelming to Alex that this relationship was something he could have. That there was nobody interfering with his life choices and nobody holding them back.

It had taken them awhile to work everything out and actually put a name to their relationship.  Everyday they seemed to still be learning to communicate more clearly and actually listen to the each other. But it was getting easier, one day at a time. They still talked a lot about what happened to them when they were younger; about wars and awful foster homes. Getting to know each other. Everyday a bit more.

After the big “showdown” everything was a complicated mess. Kyle was injured, Noah was missing, and Isobel was completely beside herself. Liz needed time to process everything that went down, to reassess the things she thought she knew about Rosa, and Max was trying to help in every way he could. 

Michael and his communication skills were forced to get better once Michael went on a self-sacrificing mission to save Alex, even after promising him that he wouldn’t do that. Getting abducted by his own father wasn’t something he was dealing with easily even after all the abuse Alex endured from him. But having the person he loved coming face to face with the literal embodiment of both of their nightmares was unbearable. His father let him free in exchange for Michael, even when Alex did everything in his power to resist, but Michael was stubborn. He had learned that the hard way.  

In moments like this when Alex was lying close to Michael he truly let himself absorb his warmth; letting himself watch his partner sleep and kissing his shoulder, even with these comforts his thought still lingered on the desperation and fear he was feeling while trying to get to the others. At the time he was sure that he wouldn’t get the chance to tell Michael that he still loved him, that using past tense in front of the trailer that day didn’t mean anything. After Michael showed him his bunker Alex was sure he would lose him to another planet, but he wasn’t prepared to face the fear of losing him involuntarily and without a goodbye.

The whole rescue mission that followed was still only a haze to Alex. He could remember holding a severely injured Michael in his arms while Max healed him. Dragging an injured Kyle out of the military facility to heal him later after Max regained some of his energy. Hearing Isobel crying and screaming that she couldn’t find Noah, that he wasn’t there like they thought he would be. Watching Liz and Maria gathering any information they could use, trying to ignore the chaos around them and Liz trying to calm Maria down, who got drawn into this whole mess a few days prior. All the details blurred together in a mess of pieces he barely remembered.

They all needed time apart after that in the hopes of processing the trauma they had lived through in the matter of a few months. A few days passed with everyone staying isolated on their own or in pairs. In the meantime Noah was found by a few soldiers in a secret military facility that his father set up after he suspected Noah to be an alien too.  

For Alex it became obvious very quickly that Michael needed to see his siblings, he had to be sure they were alive and well. A few phone calls later he realized that everybody, including himself, was feeling the same. They all met at Max’s place, bringing food and comfort, they camped out there for a while. Isolated from the whole town, just going out to get a few necessities. They sat together a lot, trying to talk about all the things that happened. And when talking was too much they sat together, understood each other in silence, giving each other comfort.

It was weird for Alex that this whole group of people became inseparable in such a short time. Those were people he grew up with, but besides Maria and Liz he wasn’t close to any of them in present time. But trauma can bring people together apparently, because Alex seemed to see these people all the time now and if he was being honest he wouldn’t want to change that. 

Alex knew that he thought too much about what happened a few months ago. He knew that it wasn't good for him to dwell on it so much, but some nights he needed to hold onto the fear knowing Michael was right beside him. On some particularly rough nights he needed to face his fear of losing the love of his life, while carding through his lovely curls and kissing his shoulder like he was doing right now.

“Stop staring at me, Manes,” Michael said suddenly with a smile apparent in his voice, sounding groggy and sleepy. 

Alex chuckled at that. “Don’t flatter yourself, Guerin. I just couldn’t sleep.” 

“Yeah. I know,” Michael responded without opening his eyes but his arms instead. “Come here.”

And Alex went willingly. Settled with his back to Michael’s chest, he covered his scarred hand with his own as Michael put his arm around his waist, and pulled him closer. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Michael asked once they were comfortable. 

“No, I don’t think so. Not now anyway. It was...the usual bad dreams,” Alex replied hesitantly, because they do talk about things like that, but right now it was nicer to fall asleep again in Michael’s arms.

“You know that you can wake me up after a nightmare, right?” Michael asked softly and kissed the back of his head. 

“I know, Michael. Of course I know,” Alex answered quietly, he caressed Michael’s hand absentmindedly. 

Alex could feel Michael nod behind him. “Try to sleep. I’ll make you breakfast in bed tomorrow and then we’ll talk,” Michael whispered and kissed his shoulder, he pulled him even closer against his chest. 

“I love you.” 

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> [come and say hi and maybe reblog on tumblr](https://intergalacticships.tumblr.com/post/183895786770/aftermath) :)


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